Fuzzy-Wuzzy Soap

Ahh, the simple days of old, long before computers, video games, and other modern-day diversions that capture the attention of the nation’s youth.

In those simple days, a kid’s interest could be piqued by things like soap that grew fur.
And the power of advertising would cause that kid’s interest to bloom into full-blown obsession, causing relentless hounding of the parents into obtaining this truly strange example of Boomer nostalgia.

I mean, think about it. Soap that grows fur? Fur much like that which sprouted on that forgotten turkey left over from Thanksgiving which you discovered looking for something to munch on during the NFL playoffs two months later.

The origin of Fuzzy-Wuzzy soap was impossible for me to track down. It was manufactured by an outfit called Aerosol Corporation, which, as near as I can tell, was swallowed up by someone else called CAC Industries, which continues to manufacture novelty soaps.

However, Fuzzy-Wuzzy, the hair-growing soap, is no more.

But what a glorious existence it had! It was endlessly hawked on Saturday morning TV commercials, ensuring that we kids would be hooked on the idea of hair-growing soap residing in our millions of bathrooms.

But wait! There’s more!

Hidden deep inside each Fuzzy-Wuzzy soap was a toy! Shades of Cracker Jack and sugary-sweet cereal! This truly was brilliance in product design.

So Fuzzy-Wuzzy soap sold millions of their offerings to eager Boomer kids everywhere.

How did it work? I don’t have a clue. Like I said, childhood recollections of the hirsute astringent are many, but actual documented facts are rare. The fur would apparently begin growing after the soap was removed from its sealed plastic bag. The fur was of a nature that simply touching it caused it to wither and vanish on the spot. And once you actually used the soap, the show was over. The hidden toy provided great impetus for kids to scrub themselves beyond squeaky-clean in an effort to gain access to that treasure hidden deeply inside.

In fact, some kids threw common sense to the wind and ATE their way to the center!

The toy was a typical plastic trinket, a whistle or some-such. Its discovery would often be accompanied by disappointment, causing us to recall our fathers’ oft-repeated wise words on those long drives to vacation destinations: “Getting there is half the fun!”